Regular readers know that while I am from a large family, I do not plan to have one myself. I believe that having a large family is rather like having a celibate marriage in that it is ideal only for a select few, and in reality often comes about through significantly-less-than ideal circumstances. If an angel from God appeared to tell me to have a large family… then I would just have to assume that it was really not an angel.
I believe that, apart from very particular circumstances, parents are called to parent their children. Any choice that detracts from this, even the choice to have more children, should be called into question.
When I state my beliefs, I offend people. Apparently as a seventh-born child it is my duty to provide a safe-haven for those who choose to have many children. Alas, my parents were so busy with my younger siblings that they neglected to train me for this role in the world.
I often feel badly when reading comments/tweets/emails from people whom I have hurt, but sometimes I am just amused. Because, you see, it seems that many people do not know what a large family is.
I do not plan to have a large family. I do plan to ideally have… perhaps… 5 children.
It is obvious to me that there is no contradiction there because 5 children does not a large family make. It is humanly possible to really parent 5 children. But other people are silly. Some imagine that I am condemning them for having a third child. And this I find most confusing and amusing because not only do I not condemn anyone; I think of 3 children as a somewhat small family.
How many children do you imagine when you hear the term “large family?”
- I am thankful 11/14/2010